A Beginner’s Guide to Weird Dildos
Let’s be honest - most people’s first reaction to weird dildos is a mix of fascination and “What the hell am I looking at?” And that’s fair. Some of these toys look like they belong in a museum of alien biology or a fantasy warlock’s chest. Tentacles, knots, glowing veins, and egg-laying wands? Yeah, we get the raised eyebrows.
But once you push past the weird, something clicks. You start to realise that these toys aren’t just outrageous. They’re intentional. They’re crafted. They’re designed to spark something deeper than just arousal.
And if you’re a beginner to the world of weird dildos, you’re not alone. Most of us didn’t start here either.
What Are Weird Dildos?
In the fantasy toy world, “weird” usually just means non-human. That could be anything from a thick, scaled dragon shaft to a squishy alien tentacle or a knotted canine design with a flared head. Some have magical lore behind them. Others are pure creative chaos. All of them challenge what a sex toy “should” look like - and that’s kind of the point.
You’re not just buying a toy. You’re summoning a fantasy.
And no, they’re not dangerous or gimmicky. The best weird dildos are made from body-safe silicone, handcrafted in small batches by artists who obsess over detail, texture, and function.
How to Choose Your First Weird Dildo
Here’s the thing: you don’t need to go straight into the deep end with a two-foot demonic knotted ovipositor that lays glowing eggs. Unless you want to - in which case, we support your journey.
But if you’re new, here’s how to ease into it:
- Start small: Choose something similar in size to what you’ve already used
- Pick gentle textures: Go for spirals or subtle ridges rather than aggressive spikes
- Check the firmness: Soft silicone is more forgiving and beginner friendly
- Look for symmetrical shapes: Asymmetry can be fun later, but it’s easier to start with a consistent curve
- Read real reviews: The fantasy toy community is vocal, honest, and wildly helpful
- Let yourself be weirded out - that’s part of the charm
One of our favourite customer stories came from someone who bought a small tentacle dildo after watching a bit too much fantasy smut. They said, “It looked ridiculous in my hand, but the moment I used it, I forgot it wasn’t real.” That’s the vibe.
Why “Weird” Can Feel So Good
Weird toys hit different - literally. The texture, shape, and proportions are unlike anything else. That means new pressure points, unexpected stretch, and a level of fantasy immersion that can take solo play from casual to cinematic.
Also, weird toys help you get out of your head. They’re playful. They invite exploration. They give you permission to stop performing and start experiencing.
There’s something liberating about moaning over a toy shaped like a tentacle. Something rebellious. Sexy. Even healing.
Quick Tips for Your First Weird Toy
✔ Use water-based lube - lots of it
✔ Warm up slowly, especially with toys that have exaggerated features
✔ Clean thoroughly before and after every use
✔ Don’t expect it to feel like a regular toy - that’s the whole point
✔ Laugh if you need to. Pleasure should never feel too serious
✔ Trust your body. If something doesn’t feel good, stop and try something else
Q&A Corner
Is it normal to feel awkward about using a weird dildo?
Completely. It’s unfamiliar territory. But awkward doesn’t mean bad. Often, the weirdest toys bring the most honest reactions.
Do people actually use ovipositors and monster dildos?
Yes — and they rave about them. For some, it’s about kink. For others, it’s sensory, imaginative, or simply fun. You don’t need a reason beyond curiosity.
Are weird dildos gender-specific?
Not at all. Weird toys are for anyone with an open mind and a curious body.
Explore the Wild Side
You don’t need to identify as kinky, or freaky, or part of some niche community to enjoy a weird dildo. All you need is curiosity.
The world of fantasy toys is big and strange and beautiful. It’s full of shapes that defy biology and textures that feel like spells. Whether you’re into gentle tentacles, bold dragon knots, or squishy alien ridges, there’s something here for you.
Weird dildos aren’t about shock value. They’re about pleasure with personality. Imagination that touches the skin.
→ Shop our most popular weird dildos and start your story